Now I must truly admit that I have aged and I am old per Se. No doubts about that. Not that I am not admitting that I am old in years but more of old mentally and physically. What was a normal routine which in my normal condition, I would have done it in no big deal a time is now taking me a longer period to complete the task.And it is getting harder to focus on things that require deep thinking.

Take for instance on Tuesday, last. If not for the presence of my younger ,more robust sister of 40++ years, I wouldn't have been able to complete the task of going through the papers, getting them signed, stamped and then rushing to Putrajaya to get the papers done and signed by 4.30 in the afternoon. Of course, the bonus was little sister's best friend was there to assist in the final stage of the whole works. But physically and mentally , I was stretched to the maximum. The big test, which was saved to the last, was the journey home. The drive home was indeed the real test. Trying to focus when the mind says it wants a rest right now. The body also echoing its aye aye and the synchronised effort was too much for me and it was a great to reach home. Thank you dear husband for being so understanding . Dinner was bread . Sorry Atif, you came home very hungry expecting hot rice. But as usual being your polite self you assured me it was ok and you will find dinner later. To Syikin , I know you don't mind so much since you are trying to lose some weight, but if I had cooked, you wouldn't have resist the temptation to indulge.

So, thank you once again little sis Rufa. You are a gem. Come to think of it you were doing most of the running- how come I am the one tired out. I am old already la Rufa, thats why It had been a good quality time spent with you. I have discovered a lot of things about your work, especially its limits and boundaries. I have always thought the law people are knowledgeable in all aspects but I was wrong. Like me, the teacher, we become experts in a small section of the big picture. Thank you bro - in law Zubir for filling in the information on the what to do and what to do next. You ARE THE EXPERT. Thanks once again.

Anyway , the water cress and the kailan are still sitting tight in the fridge waiting to be cooked. Thought this morning I would wake up earlier to prepare dinner but still am recuperating from the physical strain.Perhaps this evening I will do a quick fry up. Sweet sour pomfret with watercress soup and chili api kicap. Hmm... that would be lovely.

It has been almost a week now. And I am still trying to adjust to the new condition. The medical officer told me that I will need at least 2 weeks of adaptation period. Hmm…
The embarrassment of having to ask the speaker I am facing to repeat his/her words is almost a thing of the past, well not quite so. Maybe out of habit or what. Like today, I still couldn’t make out what my colleague next to me was saying . Maybe it was because I had only one side of the aid on. Having both on would amplify everything a lot times more. The first time I had them on, it was quite unbearable. The sounds of the car tyres spinning from what was once a ‘silent’ car, the sounds of the fan blades in the bedroom twirling rather loudly, turning down the volume of the car audio system , down 5 notches . For the first time, the children are telling me that I am talking in whispers . Everything around me is being amplified almost 100 times more than the usual state of sound that I am used to.
I could hear the voices of the men staff chatting in the canteen once I stepped out of the car, and that is about 100 metres away. Loud and clear their topic of conversation. But having said that I can also hear other noises because this device amplifies all sounds , regardless.
But of course, it is a definite no to be in a noisy room. The noise level is too much to handle. Perhaps , by next week everything would be okay.
On the hand, I am anxious to register my status at the Welfare Department to get the official disabled person status. Well, not that I would want the whole world to know my current state of being, but maybe it is going to be of much help later on.
Now, the next mission is to get my throat checked. The lump is getting bigger.