My Journey ( Part 4 ) My family
Boy girl boy girl. My standard answer when asked how many children do, I have? Once they hear that, normally the next statement would be hey, how did you do that? The Malays would say selang bunga or direct translation would be alternate flower or in this case is alternate gender. It is a term used when one has children of alternating sequence in gender. Kun Faa ya Kun. It is not for me to decide.
Syukur Alhamdullilah. All praise be to Allah. His plans have enabled me to reproduce 4 beautiful children and now to see my children reproduce and bear me 7 beautiful grandchildren. Alhamdullilah. Alhamdullilah until now there are 2 generations of the Samsudin Hj Taib and Wan Zakiah ‘s clan. May Allah bestowed many more generations to come. May there be many more branches to sprout from the main Family tree of the Hj Taib family and Hj Wan Omar family.
To my children, here is an example of your line of heritage from your father’s family tree and from your mother’s family tree.
Amir Iswadi bin Samsudin bin Hj Taib bin Mustafa bin Ikondonso bin Kam Soo bin Iman Baweh
Your late paternal grandfather was from the suku kaum Ponorogo in Pulau Jawa Tengah.From the research done on the family tree of your father, it was traced until a religious scholar, known as Imam Baweh. Imam Baweh was from the Ponorogo tribe in Pulau Java Tengah.
Your father is the fifth generation of the Imam Baweh, and thus all my children are the sixth generations of the Imam Baweh clan. And my grandchildren are the seventh generation of the Imam Bawah family tree.
It is the norm that the surname of the children is that of their father’s and not their mother’s. But having said this, it cannot be denied that all of you have in your blood, DNAs from your mother’s side too.
Thus, my father is Wan Omar bin Wan Hamid bin Wan Ahmad Kulim bin Wan Awang bin Wan Yusof (Shah Bandar Kuala Kedah) bin Wan Mat @Wan Sidek (Bendahara) bin Wan Johan (Dato ’Bendahara Paduka Seri Maharaja Sura) bin Wan Long (Bendahara).
I am the ninth generation of the Wan Long (Bendahara)
My mother is Wan Zaharah bt Hj Wan Ismail (Dato’ Jaya Perkasa) bin Wan Daud bin Wan Jusoh bin Wan Mohd Taib (ShahBandar) bin Wan Mohd Amin (Dato’ Seri Paduka Raja Laksemana) bin Wan Mohd Sidek (Bendahara) bin Wan Johan (Bendahara) bin Wan Long (Bendahara).
If you noticed, both my father and my mother’s roots are traced to the same family tree of Wan Long
Both Tok Haji Wan Omar and Tok Hajah Wan Zaharah lines of descendants were once warriors who served the Sultanate of Kedah. As far back as the early 18th Century. They were warriors who defended the sultan at all cost, the Bendaharas, Temenggongs and Laksamanas. They were the court officials who managed the running of the palace. I am still working on the family tree but once it’s done, I will share my writings on my blog. To be honest, it was no big deal to me when Tok Haji Wan Omar first published the book ‘Mengenal Asal Usul dan Salasilah Keluarga “in 1998. I was still working then; I did not have much time to spare for other things besides family and career. It is only now that I have the interest to read, analysed and appreciate the 30 years of research and dedication that Arwah Tok Haji Wan Omar had put into this quest to trace his roots! He did not do it alone but was helped by two of his relatives.
And also, to note that the Wan title is only inherited / carried on by the sons of the family and eventually passed down to his future sons and daughters. This has been the tradition for the Wan family of Kedah. So, the title Wan stopped with me, for our family.
So dear children of mine and my future generations, you are now part of their heritage! You have the best of both heritage... ayah’s father Hj Taib was from the line of Tok Imam Baweh from Pulau Jawa. The struggles that your paternal grandfather faced when he first landed in Tanah Melayu, the quest to ensure a new beginning for his family, for better standards of living in Tanah Melayu and so forth. He was the Ketua Kampung (that’s Leadership in him). He was a most diplomatic person. During the early years, Tanah Melayu was hit with the presence of the communists. But because of his ability to form a good rapport with all sides, he escaped from being killed by the cruel communists. I think if you read the book that I helped publish for the Hj Taib ‘s Salasilah Keluarga you will get an insight into the struggles of your grandfather Hj Taib and his wife your grandmother Hj Wakirah bt Dahlan.
It is also interesting to note that amongst us Malays, during my mother’s (your grandmother) and generations before that, once any member of the clan decides to tie the knot, the old folks would always want to know the background of the future in laws. Marriage is not just about the coming together of two people, but it is also the merging of two families. And don’t be surprised by some of the answers that they would give us when asked why the need to know the roots and family history of the potential groom/ bride? They would want to know whether there is a family history of insanity, of diseases. In short, are the potential family in laws people of good blood? But having said that, besides the genetic makeup, the environmental factors also have a great influence in shaping our personality. This is a very interesting area to explore. How much of the nature (In born traits) vs nurture (upbringing) do actually influence who we are. And even amongst our siblings we do vary in behavior and temperaments!
So dear children of mine. Perhaps one of these days when you four get together just try to do a little exercise. List down all the common interests/ personality traits that you four have. And what are the things / behaviors that is unique to just one of you. Do that and tell me your results ya. I may take up with my own siblings and I will share with you my own findings!
After you have done that maybe we can all sit down and do a bit of reflection.
So, dear dearest children of mine I may not have said this too often, but always remember my greatest treasure is my family. We may not be perfect. I may not be a perfect mother, but I love my children with all my heart.
Here’s my prayers for my children and the future generation of Samsudin bin Hj Taib and Wan Zakiah bt Wan Omar:-
رَبِّ ٱجعَلنِى مُقِيمَ ٱلصَّلَوةِ وَمِن ذُرِّيَّتِى رَبَّنَا وَتَقَبَّل دُعَآءِ
Maksudnya: “Wahai Tuhanku! Jadikanlah daku orang yang mendirikan sembahyang dan demikianlah juga keturunanku. Wahai Tuhan kami, perkenankanlah doa permohonanku”.
O my Lord! Make me one who establishes regular prayer, and also among my offspring. O our Lord! And accept Thou my prayer (Surah Ibrahim :40)
رَبَّنَا وَاجْعَلْنَا مُسْلِمَيْنِ لَكَ وَمِن ذُرِّيَّتِنَا أُمَّةً مُّسْلِمَةً لَّكَ وَأَرِنَا مَنَاسِكَنَا وَتُبْ عَلَيْنَا إِنَّكَأَنتَ التَّوَّابُ الرَّحِيمُ
Wahai Tuhan kami! Jadikan lah kami berdua orang-orang Islam ( yang berserah diri) kepadamu, dan Jadikanlah daripada keturunan kami:umat Islam (yang Berserah diri) kepada Mu, dan tunjukkanlah kepada kami syariat dan cara-cara ibadat kami, dan terimalah taubat kami:; sesungguhnya Engkau Maha Penerima taubat, lagi Maha Mengasihani.
Our Lord, and make us Muslims ( in submission) to You and from our descendants a Muslim nation ( in submission) to You. And show us our rites and accept our repentance. Indeed You are accepting of repentance, the Merciful. (Al Baqarah:128)
It’s not what we have in life, but who we have in our life the matters (J.M. Lawrence)
Two of the greatest gifts we can give our children are roots and wings (Hodding Carter)
Family is like music, some high notes, some notes but always a beautiful song!
Picture 40 : My family of 4 children. Amir Iswadi (1981), Siti Nur Aisyah (1984), Atif Ismail (1987) and Siti Nur Asyiqin (1994
Picture 41 : First son Amir and his family
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